Dissapointment

Well the title sounds worse that what I really have on my mind. This thought comes from a bunch of things that eventually cumulated with a talk involving my roommate Kony. So, if you have the few minutes it takes to read this, keep going.

It has occurred to me that I give people the benefit of the doubt more times than some people deserve. Is this because I believe that sometime they will come around and begin to see things my way? Or is it something else? Who knows?! But, all I know is that I am kind of frustrated in trying sometimes. I know that this sound really lame and maybe selfish, but really, when is enough, enough? This is only being spurred because of things that have happened recently (or at least things that I can remember). Now, I’d like to think that people know that I would probably do anything for them to help them out when they needed it or asked for it. What I am getting is the fact that I don’t expect much in return, a phone call, thanks, an explanation, just something. I prefer something over nothing any day.

Now, people who are reading are might be thinking, what the hell is wrong with Ryan? Well, honestly, nothing. I am just kind of frustrated at the moment on many different levels. Some people just don’t get the fact that when you get a message (on your phone, IM, email, etc…) that you should return it or at least acknowledge that you received it if it seems that you should do so. I find it frustrating that people don’t call back when a message is left asking so. Now, if this is because you don’t WANT to call back, ok fine, just tell me to stop calling and I will. But, if you just didn’t call back, that’s just hard for me to believe. Maybe I’ll start leaving messages that end with the following line “Call back IF YOU WISH. *click*” This might solve the problem, but I doubt it.

I’m just am tired of trying when the result ends up being the same: Nothing. Now, there are a few select people who know better than to know that they fall into this category. I am not about to go off on any particular person but (don’t make the assumption that I am directing this at a particular person … there are only 3 people that I can think of that would know if this is true or not). This is just one of a few things that are frustrating to me right now. It’s something that drives me crazy and it is something that is out of my control. This, in the end, might be the problem. I don’t have control. But, then again, it might not be. Maybe it is just something that I consider a respect issue. There is nothing I can really do, but tell it how I see it and let people know that I think that it sucks.

It’s been a while since I posted here, but I’ll start with what is on my mind right now…

Today I spent a long time in the programming lab working on this lame CSE project. Now, it.s not bad except that we have to do these projects in partners. So, this creates a problem when you have a partner who knows nothing and moves really slow. So, today we spent six and a half hours in the lab and accomplished less than I would have hoped. My biggest issue is that he needs to sit and think over every process for at least 10 to 15 minutes before we begin to program it. For some things, I could have completed the code in this time. It just begins to be frustrating after a while. Now, his excuse is that school is moving too fast and that this is his first quarter @ UW. Well, welcome to UW. It moves quickly and you need to be able to keep up with everything. I have a hard time doing this, but nevertheless I get it done day in and day out. I have to give him credit for trying his best, but I am just frustrated with the “I’m from community college and this is my first quarter” excuse. I have freshman in my FIG who are more prepared to be at a large university. It also doesn’t help that he can’t organize his time better. We end up only being able to meet two times a week to work on a project. This is really bad because we end up having to code for like 6 hours in a row. This is not only a tragic loss of my time, but it could be broken up more. Blah. It’s the weekend; shouldn’t I be relaxing and not doing work? Would that be too much to ask?

Now if you go to a CC this is in no way meaning to stereotype all CC students, It’s just that I have heard it too much this quarter from people in my major and in classes to drive me crazy.