Tag: Humor

Can She Take a Shot?

Last night was Darrin’s 22nd birthday and to celebrate we went to Red Robin for dinner then headed back to his place to place cards. The rule that we had was as follows: If you get out, you take a shot. Or, if you are shady like Sean and try to bet with the button you have to take one anyways. So, once Jamie got out it was her turn and this animated GIF is what occured. Now, keep in mind that what is in that glass is peach juice with a drop of vodka. Yeah, a drop. Refresh to see the GIF animate again. The last frame is the best.

Jamie Takes a Shot

The Weekend

Well, I made it. Like I said in my last post, this week was not as bad as I had planned. The CSE test on Friday was alright. I’m just shooting for the mean. But, the weekend is here and it is nice to not have to worry about school for a couple of days. Last night I got to spend some time with Jula and D watching Exorcist and going to the Castle Store (haha). It was good times. They got carded on their way and I asked they guy if he wanted to see mine and he said “nope, you’re ok, I just need to see theirs.” The guy carding looked not a day older than 16. Tonight, I have no idea what is going on. I’ll probably just hang out at home and just r-e-l-a-x. But, Sunday is lake day w/ the iSchool crew, so good times will be found on Sunday.

Anyways, I’m bored as hell here at work right now. But, looking at my schedule for next quarter I notice that I only have 1 class on MWF and 2 TuTh. So, that is a definite score. I guess I should go back to work and to enjoying my bachelor status on Valentines Day.

Current Feeling: Boredom/Relaxation

Excuse me, pass the gas

I was reading my dailiy humor news from fark.com and  I came across this article about how much people really pass gas. And I quote, “According to the National Institutes of Health, the average person passes intestinal gas from 14 to 23 times a day and produces about 1 to 3 pints of the stuff.” Dang, we pass gas a lot during the day. Now, this goes for the dudes as well as the laides. So, ladies, don’t be shy if you pass gas during the day. The  study says you should at least 14 times. Now, what causes you to pass gas? Well, here are some food items that would do it to you:

  • Vegetables such as cauliflower, broccoli, cabbage, brussels sprouts, onions, artichokes, and asparagus
  • Beans
  • Fruits such as apples, pears, and peaches
  • Whole grains, such as whole wheat and bran
  • Sodas and fruit drinks
  • Foods with sorbitol, often used as a sweetener in sugar-free gums and candies

So, if you are into things like the above, you might pass gas more than most  of us. But, who am I to guess. If you are really embasrassed that you pass  gas during the day it is reccommended that you do the following if you want  to reduce your gas you could try the following:

  • Avoiding anything that might increase your chances of swallowing air, such as smoking, drinking through straws, and eating too quickly
  • Avoiding or cutting down on problematic foods, such as carbonated drinks, beans, and some raw vegetables
  • Considering a food diary. If you can’t figure out what may be causing your increased gas, try keeping a journal of what you eat. You may find one or two foods that seem to increase your symptoms.

There you have it, the real scientific crap on passing gas. Now, go feel specialand don’t be around me when you pass gas, because if you are, I might just fight back.

The internet never lies! Er, yeah…

This was a convo w/ my good freind Julia tonight. Yah, the Internet never lies! Hahahaha. Man I have issues. Note: The 1st link no longer works.

[12:08 AM] Ryan: haha
[12:08 AM] Ryan: http://students.washington.edu/rprins/kelsey.htm
[12:08 AM] Jula: yea yea.
[12:08 AM] Ryan: she didn’t believe me
[12:08 AM] Ryan: that you could do that
[12:09 AM] Jula: kelsey????
[12:09 AM] Ryan: yah
[12:09 AM] Ryan: haha
[12:09 AM] Jula: hmmmmm
[12:09 AM] Ryan: it’s so ghetto
[12:09 AM] Ryan: made in word
[12:09 AM] Jula: it didn’t work.
[12:09 AM] Ryan: bah
[12:09 AM] Ryan: ok
[12:09 AM] Jula: FIX IT.
[12:09 AM] Jula: hahha jk.
[12:09 AM] Ryan: I DELETED IT
[12:09 AM] Ryan: SO THER!
[12:09 AM] Ryan: !
[12:10 AM] Jula: what no.
[12:10 AM] Jula: get it back.
[12:10 AM] Ryan: too late
[12:10 AM] Ryan: here I’ll make a new one
[12:10 AM] Jula: ok thanks.
[12:11 AM] Ryan: http://students.washington.edu/rprins/jula.htm
[12:11 AM] Ryan: The internet doesn’t lie
[12:12 AM] Jula: hahahah
[12:12 AM] Jula: YES.
[12:12 AM] Jula: but where r the files?
[12:12 AM] Jula: hahaha
[12:12 AM] Ryan: still uploading
[12:12 AM] Ryan: 10 more min
[12:12 AM] Ryan: it’s big
[12:12 AM] Jula: ahh ok
[12:12 AM] Jula: I LOVE IT.
[12:12 AM] Ryan: I can even add a pic to it
[12:12 AM] Ryan: haha
[12:12 AM] Jula: i feel special.
[12:13 AM] Jula:
[12:13 AM] Jula: YES
[12:13 AM] Jula: devote a whole page to me.
[12:13 AM] Jula: haha.
[12:13 AM] Jula: that’s the way it should be.
[12:13 AM] Jula: put a personal ad up for me
[12:13 AM] Jula: no jerks allowed.
[12:13 AM] Jula: hahaha
[12:13 AM] Jula: i tried dling her new album but they were all crappy
[12:14 AM] Jula: they did that sketchy thing
[12:14 AM] Jula: u kow?
[12:14 AM] Ryan: yah
[12:14 AM] Jula: yea HATE THAT.
[12:14 AM] Jula: can’t stand it
[12:14 AM] Jula: i shoudl really jsut go buy the cd
[12:14 AM] Jula: i think i will actaully
[12:14 AM] Jula: if i like it enuf
[12:14 AM] Jula: or have my sis get me promo copy
[12:15 AM] Ryan: ok
[12:15 AM] Ryan: look at it again
[12:15 AM] Ryan: haha
[12:15 AM] Jula: j
[12:15 AM] Jula: k
[12:15 AM] Jula: LOVE IT.
[12:15 AM] Jula: yes.
[12:15 AM] Jula: haha.
[12:17 AM] Ryan: haha
[12:17 AM] Ryan: again
[12:17 AM] Ryan: look
[12:17 AM] Ryan: haha
[12:18 AM] Jula: K
[12:18 AM] Jula: omg it’s great.
[12:18 AM] Jula: aww.
[12:18 AM] Jula: our love is ont he internet.
[12:18 AM] Ryan: haha
[12:18 AM] Ryan: wait
[12:18 AM] Ryan: one more
[12:18 AM] Ryan: haha
[12:18 AM] Ryan: k
[12:18 AM] Ryan: again
[12:18 AM] Jula: ok
[12:18 AM] Ryan: haah
[12:19 AM] Jula: hahahah
[12:19 AM] Jula: omg i toatlly laughed out loud
[12:19 AM] Ryan: haha
[12:19 AM] Jula: omg it’s a bit creepy tho…
[12:19 AM] Jula: hahahhahaha
[12:19 AM] Ryan: yah
[12:19 AM] Ryan: haha
[12:19 AM] Jula: ok almost drooled.
[12:19 AM] Jula: SICK.
[12:19 AM] Jula: hahaha
[12:19 AM] Ryan: haha
[12:19 AM] Ryan: haha
[12:19 AM] Jula: hahaha
[12:19 AM] Jula: i’m so gross
[12:19 AM] Ryan: lol
[12:19 AM] Jula: that’s why i don’t have a boyfriend.
[12:19 AM] Jula: how sad is that.
[12:19 AM] Ryan: haha

Recursion

Ok, today I spent a good three hours with the Info people working on this lame ass CSE 373 homework. Not only did it suck big time but we found that recursion sucks. If you don’t know what recursion is, well basically it is a function that calls itself over and over until it meets a condition that will make it stop calling itself. So, in basic terms it’s like this: You are told to say count up one at a time over and over until you reach one hundred. When you reach one hundred you just say, “Ok, I’m done.” With the frustration of recursion we found the following funny quotes funny:

– Suck me recursively until NULL.
– Love me recursively.
– Recursion sucks @$$!
– CSE 373 sucks recursively, forever and ever.
– Eat me recursively.
– Annoy me more recursively. (Like this is hard to do ;))

OMG PICTURES!!!

These picures are in no particular order…

– Checking out the fortune

– Alex on a cellphone that isn’t his… since his is still busted

– Diana’s Nose… Don’t ask.

– This was supposed to be our Gay pic, but I messed it up by really looking Gay.

– Jeff and Jula out of focus

– Diana in her domain… eating.

– When vests attack!!!

– My reaction to getting my “boob” groped.

– I can’t even look at her after she groped me.

– Julia being… well, Julia.

– We wanted a picture of this guy in the background with the sign that was walking around in the HUB. Insead, you have the side of my head :/

– Uh…. Who knows.

– She’ll be sorry she did this when she gets sick.

– Again my nose and a finger that is not mine in it.

– That’s my lazy eye looking back at you!

Today’s Victim

Again today I amaze myself. I was going downstairs to get a drink out of the fridge to put into this cup I have from IKEA. I set it on the counter so I could open the fridge and get the drink out. While setting the cup down I notice that our Brita pitcher was empty on the counter from earlier in the day when I emptied it into my Nalgene before classes. So, I figured that I would fill it up so I had the water for tomorrow. As I precede to pickup/move the pitcher towards the direction of the sink I nudge the cup off of the counter and onto the floor. The first hit was amazing, it didn’t break. However, on the second hit it completely fell apart and was in pieces on the floor. Startled, I made some not so nice comments directed at myself then I proceeded to clean up my mess. I got the large parts picked up quite easily and when I got to this small piece of the cup it decided to make by day by puncturing the fragile skin on my left pinky. So, now I am bleeding all over my finger and the blood is coming out quite rapidly. I go to the sink to wash it off and it seems that the wound doesn’t know the meaning of stop bleeding. After it slowed down I made my move and put a band-aid no my pinky to stop the bleeding.

Now, needless to say this is quite silly on my part, but this is the third day in a row that I have done something to physically harm myself. I have now successfully cut my right index finger on a pair of scissors opening a box, burned my left index finger making dinnfer, and now I cut my left pinky on a piece of glass that I was trying to pickup.

However, in other news…. I dropped I S 300. That class is lame and was not worth my time and effort. So, my updated schedule can be found here.